Why do people want a threesome?

Sex involving three people is a very delicate question which can arise in any couple. Usually, this idea occurs to men but sometimes women also offer this. So why do people want a threesome? Psychologists name several reasons why people have such sexual fantasies:



  1. A desire to have sex with someone else but not to be unfaithful;
  2. A desire to bring something new to sex life;
  3. Psychological problems with self-esteem;
  4. Impaired puberty, teenage hypersexuality;
  5. Sexual complexes.

Psychological aspect of a threesome

Many partners can not only bring to life the idea of a threesome but they can not even speak about that with their partner. Clearly, such a conversation can shock a partner, especially if the couple have a long-lasting relations. If you are determined to touch on this topic, think well whether you really need a threesome, what does it mean to you and what are the consequences and only then think about the arguments you will give to your husband.

If you are thinking of sex involving three people because your sex life is too boring, do not rush to change your life so dramatically. Try sex toys or role games first.

If the reason is a relationship problem then experiments with a threesome can only make the situation worse. Psychologists think that after such adventures, a couple is going to break up very soon. If not everything goes smoothly in your relations, sex with three people can completely destroy it. Jealousy and feeling of inferiority play a key role in this case. For this reason, if a  husband offered to try a threesome, this is a sign for a woman that she is not good enough and is not able to  arouse him sexually.

If you want to have new emotions and feelings, then you can experiment with it.

What to discuss beforehand?

When you decided on your own motives, find out the attitude of your partner to a threesome. If your wife (or your husband) does not want to have a threesome, do not insist on it as she or he can take your fantasies in a wrong way: jealousy, doubts about her or his own attractiveness and sexuality. Your wife can think that she is not able to satisfy you. If your partner agrees and supports you in your desire to bring something new to your sex life, discuss everything beforehand:

  • So, the problem how to talk a girl or a guy into a threesome is solved. Decide beforehand who is going to be your third partner, a man or a woman. Of course, usually the third partner is a girl but the variant a man + a woman + a man occur in 43% of cases.
  • The next question is how to find the third partner? We think that you should exclude your acquaintances or friends from the list of candidates. Sex can cause embarrassment, confusion and end of friendly relations. The best candidate is an absolute stranger. On the Internet there are a lot of sites where you can find a suitable person.
  • Discuss with your partners the boundaries of permissible during a threesome.

Technique of a threesome

Do not forget that a threesome requires a lot of efforts and skills so that all the participants enjoyed the process. Of course, there is no any special threesome technique but some positions will be helpful:

  1. A man is between the legs of a half-sitting woman and the second girl is on top in cowgirl position. A man can caress with his hands one or both girls;
  2. A missionary position with one of the girls, the second is lying next to her. A man caress and kisses the second girl;
  3. Both girls are on top with their backs to each other. One is having vaginal sex and the other girl is receiving cunnilingus;
  4. One girl is lying with her face down, a man is on top. The second girl is near and a man can stimulate her clitoris;
  5. Both girls are in a knee-elbow position, a man goes from one girl to another.

If a husband or a wife wants a threesome and they agreed upon this delicate question, they can experiment. However, if one of the partners hesitates, do not insist and try something less extreme.